What to do if I have a 5 year old son and his father has never cared and been in and out of his life since day one?

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What to do if I have a 5 year old son and his father has never cared and been in and out of his life since day one?

He was a druggie a thief and just a selfish person. We never married. He went to jail 3 years ago got out last year. He’s only seen my son maybe 4 times in the last 4 years. He threatens to take him and acuses me of stuff. He’s a piece of crap. He loves the fact of hurting me by saying stuff like that. He still smokes weed and drinks everyday. His mom told me this. His mom is a pill head an sells pills. I don’t want these people in my sons life. They pop up when its convenient for them or Christmas. They want to see him for Christmas should I let his father see him? Do I have to? What do I do? I want full complete custody of my son. Would I win?

Asked on December 18, 2012 under Family Law, Oklahoma

Answers:

Anthony Van Johnson / VANJOHNSON LAW FIRM, L.L.C.

Answered 11 years ago | Contributor

If you and your son's father were never married, then you have sole legal and physical custody. You do not have to let them see or speak to your son at all.  In order for the son's father to have any visitation or custodial rights, he would first have to "legitimate" your son in the Superior Court.  Accordingly, I will assume that he has not filed a petition for legitimation.  Thus, you can (if you so desire) tell him not to call you or come to your residence or place of business.  If you feel he is stalking or harrassing you, you can obtain a TPO (Temporary Protective Order).  However, he is reqiured to pay child support.  So, you should either contact child support enforcement or retain the services of an attorney to pursue child support.  Child support is completely separate and unrelated to visitation/custody.


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